The Good Horseman -a tale about egos

A lot has been said about the Ego, but really … what is this entity? Some see a terrible monster who must be killed, and spend their life trying to destroy it with all kinds of blows … or mantras, therapies... Others have been taken over by it: a skilled magician who promises eternal happiness in return for total submission … and of course never keeps his word. Others say they finished their Ego centuries ago, but what they do not know is that it’s hidden behind their own eyes; others can see it, but they cannot, and so the argument starts.

The only truth, is that this “terrible” entity is part of each and every one of us, and discarding it “in order to be free,” they stop living their own lives, put on a fake mask, play a fake self, with which they identify, and all this makes them believe that their decisions are truly their own… But the false controller self, contrary to popular belief, can only exist when the Ego occupies a place that is not its own.

Life is basically a play -in the good sense-, and every existing being needs a “character” to be on stage. As a new entity that emerges from the ONE, a drop of Light (the Essence), you need a solid shape to manifest on this plane… so Creation can keep happening every instant… This particular shape, and nothing else, is the natural Ego, or the EgoMindBody complex: a complete tool, sophisticated indeed, but a tool after all, and therefore always at the service of the real Self, or Consciousness. We should not give this natural and healthy Ego, the wrong job in the work of Existence, knowing that being a vehicle for the Drop of Light is what fulfils it, which will make them both happy. To explain this more clearly, let’s just say if we tried to think with our feet and walk with our brain, neither would benefit at all, and we would die within seconds…

To see this in action, imagine a furious rider chasing his horse around trying to kill it because it’s not well tamed, the horse is “too heavy” and “confuses the rider.” Would that make sense? Now imagine another rider whose horse became his boss, forcing the human to carry it on his back day and night… now it is the rider who chases the carrot… sounds exhausting… But there’s more: over there is another rider with glasses that only let him see what is at the same level as his eyes, so that he can’t see the horse underneath, and thus goes through life in permanent denial, believing that it is he who walks and not the horse, while the animal is laughing at him and making him go crazy…

(Of course, real horses are not at all traitors as a spoiled ego would be, but rather the opposite, so I want to make it clear that in this article I will use the horse as the traditional symbol of the human mind, and not the animal itself… forgive me, horses…).

The world is actually full of these riders, and they all suffer endlessly in ignorance: seeing the enemy where there is only a wonderful tool and ally that the ONE gave them for their convenience…
Then suddenly, here comes a smiling rider on a horse without a bridle or a saddle, not even trying to make the animal obey him, he just whispers to it… and his steed does everything he says!

Other riders will look at him with envy, and so do their own horses, snorting. Agitated, kicking and biting each other, they revolt at the newcomer’s smile and the peaceful and confident look of his horse, who does not understand why his peers are tied to the teeth, tortured, and at war with their guides…

On the other hand, the smiling rider does understand -his horse does not remember it now, since love washed away all the suffering of the past, but long ago, he too fought with his horse, until someone put a mirror in his way, and seeing himself as an ugly dictator, felt ashamed and changed his attitude. He realized then that the horse was an almost divine gift, and started to feel grateful. He apologized to his horse, took all the ties and straps away and healed its wounds. He led the horse into a meadow, gave him water, and when he was calmer, he went over to him, face to face, no tricks, no gimmicks. At first the horse tried to bite him, and kicked the air and ran away, looking askance and neighing nervously. The rider then sighed, day after day going back to his job in a corner of the meadow.

He began to bring candy and left it close by, sometimes the horse came to eat it, but when he rider stretched out his hand to touch him, the horse galloped away, snorting. Everything seemed to point that he would never mount his steed again. Now it seemed like the animal trusted him even less than before. However, that had not been real trust, the horse had been enduring the torture out of fear of starvation and predators.

But now the horse was in a meadow, lounging, eating everything he wanted, with no danger in sight, not planning to leave its own paradise anytime soon. At times, the rider regretted having left the horse free, because he thought he could not get it back. Once he was about to abandon it there and leave, but something stopped him, saying, “How will you survive without a horse, in a world where everyone has one? You will be a complete stranger, will not understand anything, and eventually die from isolation… and the same will happen to your horse, which will be left all alone after all…“.

So the rider cultivated his patience and devotion, and waited for days, months, almost years, to gain his horse’s trust and affection, until one day, the horse kneeled down to let the rider climb on its back, letting him know that they were ONE. Excited, the rider mounted on his back, feeling the same unity. There was a very special connection in that moment: since there was no barrier between them -no saddle, no spur-, they became one same entity… something that almost resembled a centaur, and yet you could still clearly distinguish what was what. The horse, who had seen itself, gave command back to the rider -the Drop of Light-, who could see better from the heights, and the rider, who had also found his place, surrendered the earthly energy to the horse, who ruled on the ground beneath his hooves. Only when the Drop of Light went to visit the realms of the ONE, the horse would wait nearby, while his rider walked on terrains only accessible to a different kind of feet…

In the equestrian world, there’s a new school of thought, involving ways to taming horses without pain or fear.

(No taming is fair, since all animals should live free and not to serve humans (or be devoured by them), but this method at least allows humans who want to befriend a horse, to become real friends with the horse, and not a dictator on its back).

This taming is based on understanding the psychology of the animal, its reactions, its language, to “speak horse”. Waiting for the horse to approach you, rather than chasing it, and making it see that you are not a predator but one of their own (I think it will work better if the human trainer is really a non-predator, aka 100% vegetarian…). The technique incorporates some massage points to completely relax the horse, so they end up lying down, and the “trainer” can even lie down on top of them. At the end of the process, the horse trusts humans, and is open to new directions. Trainers usually begin to ride them right away, teaching them “walk, trot, canter, gallop” with voice signals, never with spurs or whips.

A fully trusting horse is a powerful ally, never an enemy. This system inspires more than a simple “less cruel” technique of domestication; it’s the perfect metaphor for learning to tame our own “horse”, our EgoMindBody complex… but mainly the Ego, which then will direct the Mind; and the Body will then do whatever the Mind orders… If you try to control the Mind, the Ego will reclaim its place… and so will the Mind, if we do not give it its rightful place leading the Body, and will play tricks on us if we try to get in the way… So the work of the Drop of Light (us riders) must always be on the Ego, so to speak, “the horse’s soul.” Once we make peace with it sincerely, all the pieces of the “Human Being” complex will fall into place and there shall be no betrayals by any of the parts involved.

Long story short, killing your ego is neither possible nor advisable, and the only problem there is with it, is that the roles are confused. Those who say they have no ego, usually control their horse with painful spurs, saddle and a bridle made of thorns. They keep their horse so submitted, denied, falsely “controlled”, that while tension and pain are still there, the horse does not deviate one inch, and the riders believe it never will. But abuse only generates anger, and it builds up until, “unexpectedly,” that “saint”, that “heavenly being”, is triggered by something, loses the control he never had, and his horse goes wild. And of course, this won’t an ordinary horse tantrum, but one full of bitterness and hatred… completely out of control, and difficult to repair.

It is time to realize that each of us is a whole unit and, for this complex collective being to work, all parts should be in place: the force, Consciousness, the Essence (that Drop of Light)… In the same way, all living things are part of another much larger unit, but basically identical. So, each of us as individuals, must find our place in it too… Is it not worth it to reflect this in our daily lives? Do not forget that we living beings are the connection between the ONE and Mother Gaia, and when we harmonize horse and rider within us, we generate the stream of Life.

Finally, and going back to our equine brothers, who are also drops of Light with their own vehicle, and with the same desire for freedom and happiness as everyone else, I will say that our own EgoMindBodies are the only horse we should tame and ride…

Nieve Andrea, Dec 21^st 2009